Connect with us

Relationship Tips

Why Can’t I Find Love? 16 Reasons Why You’re Still Single!

Published

on

depressed woman sitting in room
some tips to help you land a new Relationship!

Why can’t I find Love?

One of the most lovely and incredible experiences you will ever feel in your entire life is falling in love. It’s a truly magical experience, so it’s not strange that innumerable songs, poems, and well-known works of literature have attempted to describe the joy and excitement of being madly in love. In fact, it frequently seems as though falling in love is the center of the universe.

But even with online dating literally at our fingertips, it’s not always as simple as they make it out to be in the movies. However, there are times when it seems like the more effort you put forward, the further away you are from making a meaningful connection, and you find yourself wondering, “Why can’t I find love?”

Get to the source of the problem, advises Roxy Zarrabi, a clinical psychologist who specializes in relationships, in order to change any dating pattern. The good news is that love can and, more importantly, will come your way despite the fact that there may be a variety of reasons why it hasn’t happened yet.

Here is why you can’t find love

man sitting on concrete bench
Photo by Lamar Belina on Pexels.com

Continue reading to find out the top sixteen reasons you might be having trouble finding love and what you can do to stop the cycle.

You choose people who are not available.

How would you describe the persons you’ve dated if you were to reflect on your past relationships? “You can be subconsciously lured to unavailable partners if you consciously seek a lasting relationship but continually receiving different results,” explains Zarrabi. In other words, you may be choosing to be with individuals who can’t actually give you what you need and deserve, which may be the reason you haven’t found love yet.

You might unconsciously be drawn to unavailable people if you deliberately want to be in a committed relationship but continually receiving different results.

For instance, you might discover that you are attracted to men who don’t desire a commitment or to women who are only looking for a one-night stand or friends with benefits. You’re choosing to be with people who aren’t searching for a long-term relationship, which is a classic example of self-sabotage, rather than being able to have a deep, meaningful, and committed relationship with someone.

Zarrabi advises compiling a list of warning signs that former relationships displayed that let you know they were emotionally unavailable if finding love is genuinely your top concern. When dating someone new, in particular, go through the list frequently and look out for the warning flags. She also advises taking a close look at your own attachment style as well as the attachment styles of the people you are drawn to in order to understand how and why you can be making the same mistakes. Self-awareness can boost your chances of finding true love by enabling you to choose a partner who shares your values.

You’re Concerned About Being Hurt

Breakups can be devastating, and it can be difficult to start over and open up to someone new if you’ve already been injured or deceived by someone. Perhaps you are consciously seeking commitment, but secretly you are afraid of being wounded, losing your sense of self in the relationship, or experiencing actual closeness.

But in order to find true love, you have to be open to vulnerability once more because that is the only way for a profound and intimate connection to happen. You won’t ever be able to find love if you build barriers, keep your spouse at a distance, and forbid them from getting near to you since your relationship will never go beyond a surface-level one.

The truth is that you have to take a chance on being hurt in order to discover love. Despite how tough it may seem to trust someone with your heart once more, it is worthwhile to make this leap of faith.

Make sure you’re looking forward rather than back if you’re having trouble getting past these emotions. Keep in mind that there is no such thing as false hope when moving on when you are recovering from a previous failed relationship, or even from a string of them, advises psychologist Jeffrey Bernstein, Ph.D. But it’s crucial to understand that you STILL have influence over the future of your relationship in order to sustain your optimism.

You don’t believe you merit it.

When it comes to love, confidence and self-esteem are really important. However, a lot of people struggle to find love because they don’t believe they are deserving of it. These kinds of beliefs can have a profound effect on our lives and can have origins dating back to early infancy.

It’s important to acknowledge how your lack of confidence is influencing your behavior and preventing you from interacting with people if you frequently have poor self-esteem and strong emotions of self-doubt. The key to unlearning these beliefs, according to Zarrabi, is to “bring these beliefs and related feelings into conscious awareness and practice affirmations that challenge these beliefs.” Say it again with me: You are deserving. Working with a therapist or counselor to address these emotions can also be helpful.

Deprogramming these beliefs might begin by bringing these thoughts and feelings into conscious awareness and by using affirmations that contradict them.

Although it is difficult, you may better understand that you are a unique and great person who deserves real happiness and love by altering your perspective and making the decision to pay attention to the positives in your life rather than the bad. Or to put it another way, Bernstein exclaims, “Know your value! If you do, finding a healthy mate will be easier since you’ll be more driven to find someone who values and accepts you for who you are. Others will be drawn to your happy energy and positive feelings, and love is more likely to come your way when you can see and think that you’re worth it.

You’re Giving In

It’s crucial to hold yourself to high standards when looking for love. You should choose to be with someone because they make you happy rather than because you’ve been together for a long time or because you’re terrified of being alone, as this is the only way to find true love. Love won’t come your way if you’re choosing to be with your spouse for the wrong reasons, whether they are based on money, convenience, or the lack of other possibilities.

This is because your relationship isn’t founded on anything significant or important. Finding someone with the traits that are genuinely significant in a relationship, such as similar beliefs, values, and life objectives, must be your first priority if you want true love to enter your life.

You shouldn’t anticipate others to change for you either. Although people occasionally surprise us, Bernstein advises keeping in mind that most of the time, you get what you see. “Don’t make the error of unfairly expecting someone you like to be more like how you want them to be,” the author said. Being patient in the hopes that someone would improve will probably only end in disappointment.

All of this is not meant to imply that you should have a comprehensive list of requirements for a potential partner. In fact, especially if you have a history of picking the wrong partners, being open to people you might not consider “your type” could result in more success than failure.

Zarrabi cautions against rejecting someone if there isn’t an instant connection—especially if that connection has previously taken you in the wrong direction. In order to determine whether there is a chance for a sincere relationship to develop between the two of you, she advises trying to have an open mind and going out with this person on a few occasions. The perfect match may occasionally come as a surprise.

You aren’t exposing yourself to others

We learn from an early age through television, novels, and the like that we will find love; it will just appear out of nowhere, and we will know when it is appropriate. And despite how nice that sounds, most of us do not fit that description. It takes genuine effort to find love. Keep in mind that it is a numbers game.

The more you put yourself out there, meet and get to know people, and step beyond of your comfort zone, the more likely it is that you will discover love. But if you consistently frequent the same bars on the weekends, refuse to download a dating app, and purposefully avoid more opportunities to mingle, your chances of meeting someone interesting are diminished.

This can help you improve your chances of finding someone with whom you actually connect by spicing up your routine and presenting yourself to the dating world in novel ways. Finding love is easier when you make dating a priority and accept new interests, hobbies, and ambitions. ​

Your expectations are too high.

Standards are crucial, believe me. In fact, I usually suggest being clear about what you’re seeking for and being picky when determining whether possible partners can check off the crucial boxes. That being said, you’ll be seeking for a long time if you’re not willing to settle until you find a man who is 6’4″, independently wealthy, enjoys traveling, and wants children. In all honesty, if you’ve convinced yourself that you belong to a specific “type,” you’re probably dismissing people for the wrong reasons.

It’s time to consider your priorities because it’s unlikely that anyone you meet would match the incredibly detailed description you’ve given of your dream companion. What matters more to you? Do you want someone trustworthy or tall? Blonde or someone who is equally daring as you are? Knowing that will make it simpler for you to determine who might make a good fit.

Your defenses aren’t very good.

Have you ever noticed how frequently “putting walls up” is mentioned on The Bachelor? Everyone is fearful of being wounded, and if you’ve already been harmed—say, by an ex who cheated on you—you might be even more wary. You can lack confidence, or you might have unintentionally developed pessimism or paranoia. And as a result, you might have also created some protection mechanisms that are actually obstructing your ability to build a relationship.

When someone seems “too” into you, for instance, you can become suspicious and run away if you were reared in a home where your parents didn’t show you a lot of affection. Or, if you’ve previously experienced an unexpectedly terrible breakup, you can find yourself cutting things off early to guard against experiencing the same thing.

Whatever your protection mechanism, a fear of vulnerability lies at its core. But without vulnerability, a relationship would only ever be a superficial one that never develops into anything significant or permanent. You’ll need to look deeply into the reasons behind your fear of intimacy in order to overcome these inclinations. When and how did this anxiety start? And from what are you protected by your defense system?

You haven’t moved on from your previous relationship.

woman wearing brown shirt inside room
Photo by Felipe Cespedes on Pexels.com

It’s crucial to let go of your past before entering any new relationships. It may be challenging for new love to find you if you are still bitter about your ex. Your prospects of starting a new relationship can be ruined by constantly thinking back on your ex and comparing possible dates with them.

On the other hand, if your prior relationship ended badly, it will take some time to recover from the stress and sadness. It might not be a good idea to dive into something while you are still in pain. Spend some time thinking about the past, then try to move on. To discover love, you must mentally be prepared. Prioritize your own needs before making a fresh start.

You’re too reliant.

Every time you enter a relationship, you lose who you are entirely. You yearn to be with your lover all the time, and being apart depresses you. You become to rely on them for everything as the connection develops. You frequently look to them for approval and worry that they might reject you.
Such dependence is a symptom of insecurity and low self-worth. Potential partners are pushed away by poisonous behavior. Your chances of finding love will increase if you work on your self-worth and insecurities.

You feel that to be happy, you must discover love.

Only when a person discovers contentment within himself can they truly be happy. It is incorrect to search for love with the expectation that it will make you happy. Long-term misery will result if you tie your happiness to a specific person.

Discover inner happiness. Eat well, treat yourself, spend time on your hobbies, and pay attention to your mental wellbeing. You’ll immediately begin to experience joy and contentment. Your personality will reflect your happiness, and you just could attract the appropriate individual.

You struggle with rejection

Being rejected is difficult, especially if it comes from someone you like. But there will be many rejections along the way as you search for love. It will be difficult for you to date people if you stop trying because you are afraid of being rejected. Do not let your fear prevent you from finding real love. Maintain your positivity and self-assurance, and take a lesson from every failure. If you keep looking, you might eventually meet the right person.

You treat your partner disrespectfully

Every relationship is built on a mutual respect basis. The relationship will be irreparably harmed if you act impolitely or abuse your partner. Everybody appreciates their self-respect, so if you undermine it, it might affect how they feel about you. Nobody can endure being disparaged, exploited, or humiliated for very long. They’ll eventually tire of it and go.

Accept your error and don’t do it again in your subsequent relationship. Respect and kindness should be shown to your partner. Make them feel appreciated by showing them appreciation.

You’re uncertain of your search criteria.

You’re looking for love but don’t know what to look for. Every time you begin dating someone, you enter the relationship without thinking through your expectations and end up calling it quits soon after. No one seems to have the attributes you are seeking for, which are constantly changing. You might enter a string of unsuitable relationships if you don’t know what you want in a companion.

Think about what you want from a love relationship as you sit down. Determine the essential characteristics and the deal-breakers. Check to check if a new person has the attributes you are looking for when you first meet them. Knowing your needs will make it easier for you to locate prospects quickly.

You appear overly frantic.

It can get annoying to be patiently waiting for your true love. It’s possible that you’ll abandon all of your requirements and lower your standards in the hopes of meeting someone quickly. At some time, the need could become excessive, causing you to move too quickly in a relationship. After meeting someone, you could instantly begin to consider love and marriage. The desperate actions are not appealing and may turn people away. Enjoy yourself and the dating game. Whatever needs to happen, will. Don’t act frantic and destroy it.

You struggle with your emotions.

sleepy asian woman lying on bed
Photo by Ike louie Natividad on Pexels.com

Some experiences leave a lasting impression on your mental state. Abuse may have a significant negative impact on your confidence and self-esteem. Being unable to process the pain may cause you to become emotionally cut off. Early exposure to violence can make a person anxious and aggressive. Your current relationships may suffer and your prospects of finding love may be destroyed by such emotions.

Make sure your emotions are in order before looking for love. Work on improving yourself and get the support you need to move past old problems. Master the art of self-love. Being emotionally at ease might make it easier for you to draw in the right individual.

You portray yourself as the perfect partner.

You want someone to like you back when you do. So that you may give them your finest performance. Showing off your positive traits is acceptable, but in the long run, projecting a false ideal image can be the biggest problem. First and first, it is never a good idea to enter into a relationship on a false note. Instead of the real you, the individual will fall in love with the personality you have built.

Second, you won’t be able to maintain it for very long if it’s an act. When your lover realizes they were tricked, they will break up with you. Show them what a wonderful person you are when you’re in a relationship, but don’t try to hide your flaws. Your flaws will be accepted and loved by the appropriate person.

Continue Reading
Click to comment

Your Email address will not be published

Relationship Tips

Top best wedding songs for your dream wedding

Published

on

By

a bride and groom dancing under light strings

Here are the top wedding Songs for your dream wedding.

Different generations will attend your wedding, including grandparents, nieces, nephews, and pals your own age. Because of this, modern couples and wedding planning professionals alike concur that a decent mixture of current wedding songs should make up 40% of your playlist while the classics should make up 60%.

To assist you in selecting the ideal music in 2022/2023, we have taken the effort to compile a comprehensive selection of wedding songs. The most popular wedding songs are included (for the reception, first and last dances, mother-son and father-daughter dances, etc.), along with a bonus “ready-to-play” playlist created by the wedding DJ and a brand-new wedding song written especially for you.

Our tunes for getting ready are a blend of emotion and fun that will keep you relaxed and upbeat at the same time. The calming Best Day Of My Life by American Authors and the upbeat Marry You by Bruno Mars are both included in the current round of tracks for getting ready. Look them up below.

Also Read: Giveaway Signs you’re ready for marriage

Multipurpose songs for various points of your Reception

  • DJ Snake – Taki Taki
  • Train – Marry Me
  • Bruno Mars – Treasure
  • Jason Mraz, Colbie Caillat – Lucky
  • Jason Derulo, LAY, NCT 127 – Let’s Shut Up & Dance
  • Harry Styles – Sweet Creature
  • Justin Timberlake – Can’t Stop the Feeling
  • Sweet Tea Project – Lover’s Lullaby
  • Bebe Rexha and Florida Georgia Line – Meant to Be
  • Kygo & Imagine Dragons – Born To Be Yours
  • Niall Horan – MBlack And White
  • Maroon 5 – Sugar

Lovely entrance music

bride and groom dancing on white floor tiles
Photo by TranStudios Photography & Video on Pexels.com

It’s time to start your adventure in style after months of preparation for the big day and the ceremony of sealed partnership. It’s time to let loose, gather everyone who came to support you, and dance to some amazing tunes.

Making a dramatic entrance at your reception is the first step. You now require a flawless playlist with the hottest songs that not only describe your love story but are captivating enough to light up the entire venue. We’ve selected a few recent chart-toppers that won’t just herald your entrance in style. but will keep the visitors moving while they dance the night away and working out.

  • Weezer – Take On Me
  • Panic! At The Disco – High Hopes
  • The Proclaimers – I’m Gonna Be
  • Train – Play That Song
  • Chantal Kreviazuk – Feels Like Home
  • Ed Sheeran ft. Beyonce – Perfect Duet
  • John Legend – All of Me
  • Edwin McCain – I’ll Be
  • Faith Evans – Love Like This
  • Marvin Gaye and Tammi Terrell – You’re All I Need To Get By
  • Justin Bieber – CConfirmation
  • Kina Grannis – Can’t Help Falling In Love
  • Dan + Shay – Speechless
  • Lauv ft. Julia Michaels – There’s No Way
  • Tori Kelly – I Was Made For Loving You ft. Ed Sheeran

Best Songs at wedding receptions

a newlywed couple dancing and showered with flower petals
Photo by Amar Preciado on Pexels.com

You should play these wedding reception dance music if you want to keep your guests dancing. These universally adored songs will force everyone to show off their best moves.

  • “Dancing Queen,” ABBA
  • “Everybody (Backstreet’s Back),” Backstreet Boys
  • “Don’t Stop Me Now,” Queen
  • “Yeah!” Usher
  • “Low,” Flo Rida
  • “WOP,” J. Dash
  • “Wobble,” V.I.C.
  • “DJ Got Us Falling In Love,” Usher
  • “Pour Some Sugar On Me,” Def Leppard
  • “Raise Your Glass,” Pink
  • “We Speak No Americano,” Yolanda Be Cool & DCUP
  • “Sweet Home Alabama,” Lynyrnd Skynyrd
  • “You Can’t Touch This,” MC Hammer
  • “Gasolina,” Daddy Yankee
  • “Everytime We Touch,” Cascada

Classical Songs for wedding receptions

man and woman hugging near trees
Photo by Ricardo Moura on Pexels.com

These songs are played at almost every wedding reception for a reason. These well-known hits are surefire ways to get your visitors in the holiday spirit. These well-known wedding reception tunes will get everyone up and moving.

  • “Shut Up and Dance,” Walk the Moon
  • “Don’t Stop Believin’,” Journey
  • “Sweet Caroline,” Neil Diamond
  • “September,” Earth, Wind & Fire
  • “Love Shack,” The B-52’s
  • “Take Me Home, Country Roads,” John Denver
  • “Signed, Sealed Delivered,” Stevie Wonder
  • “You’re My Best Friend,” Queen
  • “Marry You,” Bruno Mars
  • “Now That We’ve Found Love,” Heavy D & The Boyz
  • “The Way You Make Me Feel,” Michael Jackson
  • “How Sweet It Is (To Be Loved by You),” James Taylor
  • “You Make My Dreams,” by Hall & Oates

Songs for a unique wedding reception

Would you like to perform a couple songs that aren’t played at every wedding reception? Pick one of these special songs for the wedding celebration.

  • “Adore You,” Harry Styles
  • “Taking Me Higher,” Illenium
  • “Goodnight ‘n Go,” Ariana Grande
  • “You & Me,” That Band Honey
  • “Best Part of Me,” Ed Sheeran
  • “They Don’t Know About Us,” One Direction
  • “Kiss Me,” Ed Sheeran
  • “XO,” Beyoncé
  • “Love on the Brain,” Rihanna
  • “Fallin’ All In You,” Shawn Mendes
  • “Like Real People Do,” Hozier
  • “Unapologetically,” Kelsey Ballerini
  • “All the Stars,” Kendrick Lamar and SZA

Fun songs for wedding receptions

wedding guests holding sparklers for kissing couple
Photo by Jonathan Borba on Pexels.com

Looking to have fun? Request one of these entertaining wedding reception songs from the DJ or band. A few well-known songs will keep the audience interested all night long.

Country music for wedding receptions

Country music lovers, this area is for you. These songs are the pinnacle of why country music is a popular genre for wedding music. These country wedding reception songs will make you (and your guests) feel all the feels, from sultry ballads to exuberant hits.

  • “Butterflies,” Kacey Musgraves
  • “One Thing Right,” Marshmello and Kane Brown
  • “Bless the Broken Road,” Rascal Flatts
  • “God Gave Me You,” Blake Shelton
  • “Make Me Wanna,” Thomas Rhett
  • “Alright,” Darius Rucker
  • “Make It Sweet,” Old Dominion
  • “The Fighter,” Keith Urban and Carrie Underwood
  • “Born to Love You,” LANCO
  • “I Don’t Care Who Sees,” Devin Dawson
  • “Round the Clock,” Dan and Shay
  • “I Like the Sound of That,” Rascal Flatts
  • “Every Little Thing,” Russell Dickerson
  • “Here Tonight,” Brett Young
  • “Love Someone,” Brett Eldridge

Exit songs from wedding receptions

Your departure should truly be wonderful! Your newlywed departure at the end of the night would be great with one of these wedding reception exit songs.

  • “Countdown,” Beyoncé
  • “Closing Time,” Semisonic
  • “All You Need is Love,” The Beatles
  • “Save the Last Dance for Me,” Michael Bublé
  • “You’ve Got the Love,” Florence and The Machine
  • “Love on Top,” Beyoncé
  • “Happy,” Pharrell Williams
  • “This Will Be (An Everlasting Love),” Natalie Cole
  • “Evacuate the Dance Floor,” Cascada
  • “Unconditionally,” Katy Perry
  • “Somewhere Only We Know,” Keane

Songs for the father-daughter wedding dance

a bride ang groom dancing together
Photo by Brooklynn Hossler on Pexels.com

The best music for a father-daughter dance include Maria Carey’s Hero and Sia’s The Greatest, among other currently popular songs listed below. Here is the ideal song for the father-daughter wedding dance to make your task easy.

  • Anthony Carter – Daddy’s Angel
  • Natalie Cole and Nat King Cole – Unforgettable
  • Kat Jennings and Angela Lansbury – Not While I’m Around
  • Tim McGraw – My little girl
  • Mariah Carey – Hero
  • The Temptations – My Girl
  • Krystal Keith – Daddy Dance With Me
  • Phil Collins – You’ll Be In My Heart
  • Charlie Puth – One Call Away
  • Sia – The Greatest
  • Sia – The Greatest
  • This Dance – Scott Thomas Laughridge
  • Before You Know It (Something Borrowed) – J.B. Boone & Sofia Franco

Songs for the first dance during weddings in 2022

low angle photography of bride and groom dancing
Photo by TranStudios Photography & Video on Pexels.com

You can pick one of the classic love songs like “God Bless the Broken Road” by Rascal Flatts, “For Once in My Life” by Stevie Wonder, or “I Will Always Love You” by Whitney Houston (or Dolly Parton). However, if you prefer modern lyrics and more traditional music, you might want to check out the first dance tunes listed below:

Continue Reading

Relationship Tips

Cold feet before your wedding? Tips on how to overcome it

Published

on

By

back view of person wearing wedding dress

Here is what you should do if you have cold feet before your wedding.

Do you experience anxiety before your nuptials? Perhaps you’re second-guessing your choice of spouse or having second thoughts about getting married altogether. You could be debating if you can truly make the commitment to live your entire life with one person. Do not worry. You are not alone if you feel nervous before your wedding; many individuals experience this. However, the emotions are still present, and you must learn how to deal with them.

Also Read: 10 Signs you’re afraid of Commitment

What Is Meant By “Cold Feet”?

The phrase “cold feet” refers to apprehension about continuing forward with your wedding.

According to Jocelyn Charnas, a clinical psychologist who works with people and couples at various phases of their relationships; there are times to pay more attention to these emotions of unease and times they are just a walk over. keep reading to find out more.

When it comes to our worries, concerns, and anxiety about getting married, she says, “I think of cold feet as an umbrella term.” As we prepare for this crucial life shift, experiencing anxiety and uncertainty is normal. However, having excessive amounts of fear and doubt can be exceedingly uncomfortable. Learn more by reading on.

Cold Feet Telltales

dreamy lady in white dress and barrette near windows
Photo by Furknsaglam on Pexels.com

You could be wondering whether you have cold feet, but it’s common to experience a wide range of emotions leading up to your wedding, including nervousness. According to Charnas, having cold feet can take many different forms. Some individuals openly question their future, “like whether [it] is the right person, the right moment,” the author says. Consider whether being married or committing to someone for the rest of your life is something you really want to do. You might even consider exploring ending the wedding.

According to Charnas, some indications of having cold feet are a little less obvious. Many people’s cold feet can take the form of severe anxiety related to wedding planning. It might be less about the specifics of your wedding and more about your worries of getting married if you are sobbing over decisions like what flavor of wedding cake to order or where to travel on your honeymoon.

When they get the chills, some people vent on their spouses. It can be an indication if you find yourself arguing with the person you love more frequently or if you start to find them annoying. You can also be losing your sex drive or experiencing nightmares.

What Causes Cold Feet

The fact that getting married is a major event is one reason you might be experiencing cold feet. According to Charnas, “a good dose of doubt and anxiety can imply we are taking this issue very seriously, as it should be taken.” “If we don’t experience anxiety before a significant job interview, that may indicate that we aren’t really interested in acquiring the job. I approach marriage in the same manner; we should be a little on edge, practice critical thinking, and investigate it from all sides.”

Charnas acknowledges that this is made worse by how marriage is portrayed in the media. “There is a myth that you should “just know,” which, in my opinion, is reinforced by media and Hollywood images of engagement and marriage. Although that is a great idea, in the real world some uncertainty is acceptable. Instead of suppressing it, the trick is to voice it and make an effort to get through it.”

Dealing With Cold Feet

anonymous groom catching up bride on rocky land
Photo by Dmitriy Ganin on Pexels.com

Talking about it is one of the simplest and most efficient strategies to overcome cold feet, suggests Charnas. “When I give engaged couples permission to express their worries and uncertainties aloud, I can sense the relief in the room. I advise couples to spend time talking about the things they are afraid of, whether or not you seek the assistance of a therapist or spiritual advisor.”

The good news is that you might even leave the session feeling more certain that this is your person and that you can handle anything moving forward if you talk to your spouse about having cold feet. According to Charnas, “You are already engaging in healthy marital practices if you can perceive your partner’s anxieties from a place of empathy and compassion, rather than from a posture of defensiveness.”

She also reaffirms that it’s common to experience cold feet. You don’t have to believe that you have a problem. The most crucial thing to keep in mind is that marriage is a major life transformation, and that includes a certain amount of pre-wedding anxiety. “A strong foundation for a happy and healthy relationship is getting in touch with your own worries and uncertainties and being a good listener to those of your spouse.”

Related: Giveaway Signs you’re ready for marriage

When to Avoid Getting Married

You can certainly tell yourself that pre-wedding jitters and cold feet are common. But you might be considering whether your cold feet are trying to tell you anything significant in the back of your mind. Perhaps this individual isn’t right for you, or perhaps you’re not quite ready to settle down?

According to Charnas, one of the only occasions when having cold feet indicates that something is seriously wrong is when you attempt to explain your anxieties to your partner and things don’t go well. If one of the partners is reluctant or unable to express their fears and/or hear their partner’s worries, she says, it could be a possible red sign. This lack of communication may indicate that the couple isn’t yet ready for the next stage in their relationship. Even so, it doesn’t necessarily imply you should end your relationship right immediately; instead, it just implies you might need to improve your communication abilities.

If your anxiety is so debilitating that it interferes with other aspects of your life, such as work, education, or self-care, that is something else to watch out for. “Excessive worry can be an indication of a deeper problem inside the relationship if it reaches a level that paralyzes or is very disruptive to other areas of one’s life.”

Continue Reading

Relationship Tips

Giveaway Signs you’re ready for marriage

Published

on

By

wedding couple
Read on and find out!

Signs you’re ready for Marriage.

Getting married is a big thing, whether you’ve been dating your significant other for years or just a few months. Along with the thrill of your engagement, you might be considering whether you’re showing signs of being prepared for marriage.

However, experts clarify that “being ready for marriage” can imply different things to different people. According to Julienne Derichs, a certified clinical social worker in Chicago, “from a counseling standpoint, being ready for marriage means that two individuals have the ability, at key times, to set their individual preferences aside for the sake of the relationship.”

When you’re out to dinner, what’s essential to you and your spouse may differ from what’s important to the couple seated at the table next to you, but the most important thing is that you and your partner are on the same page. Additionally, it’s crucial that you and your spouse are content with both your individual selves and your current state as a couple.

woman and man holding each others hands
Photo by Emma Bauso on Pexels.com

Your partner has your trust.

The basis of any enduring relationship is the capacity for mutual trust. Without it, even if you have love, your marriage will be tense. This is very important, says Sehat. “Consider any positive relationship in your life, whether it be with a romantic partner or a coworker. Exists there any trust?”

Your objectives are compatible.

Our lives rarely take one straight path; instead, they frequently wind, twist, and turn. Are you aware of your destination? Furthermore, have you discussed it with your partner? When you’re going in different directions, it’s challenging to be on the same page, says Sehat. “You don’t have to share the same objectives, but if you can help each other out for the good of the relationship, you’re doing well. A lot of frustration later on can be avoided by being upfront and honest about this from the start.”

You feel secure around them.

Years of misery in your marriage might be avoided if you feel safe and secure in your partnership. Sehat asserts that lack of judgment is the root of the problem. “Are you able to be yourself around this person? I would advise you to consider how that would feel for years to come if you are doing your best to be someone else. the potential impact on your self-esteem and anxiety that could result from this.”

You have experienced adversity.

It’s likely that you and your partner will encounter some obstacles along the way, so it’s important to decide if you two are ready to overcome them together. Yes, Sehat says, “problem-free love and joy in a relationship can be a beautiful thing. But working toward a challenging objective as a couple can give a marriage so much strength and trust.

You desire wedlock, not nuptials.

Do you ever imagine what happens after you say your vows and walk down the aisle in your dreams? Although the wedding is a joyous occasion, your marriage must be solid enough to last a lifetime. Sehat queries, “Can you see a future with this person beyond your wedding date?” “Do you imagine growing old with them?” Be completely honest with yourself here.

Your family likes your partner.

Introducing a new partner to your family is a huge step. While you don’t want to base your decision on what your family thinks, their opinions may sway whether you marry. “Although we have no control over this factor, it can be very important,” says Sehat. “Your family’s acceptance of your partner can help facilitate the most healthy version of your marriage. It often takes time to get there. Be patient, they are building trust too!”

You like your partner.

woman in gray jacket and brown knit cap standing on the city
Photo by Taryn Elliott on Pexels.com

“This may seem like an obvious point, so let’s clarify,” says Sehat. Like and love is not the same. Even if you are completely smitten with someone, it won’t matter if you don’t like and respect them. We know you love them, but do you like who they are? she queries. “Are you in awe of them? Do you like being with them?” Take a step back and give these questions some serious thought.

You are able to afford a wedding.

Making a commitment costs money. The majority of the time, becoming married is your couple’s first important undertaking, says Sehat. “Take some time to save for this and minimize financial burden right off the bat if you can’t afford the wedding of your dreams right now.”

Also read: 10 Signs you’re afraid of Commitment

You discuss the future in an open manner.

Sincerely, where do you see things going? Sehat inquires, “Are you open to discussing the future with your partner?” “It indicates that you consider them to be a part of that future if you are. It also demonstrates your readiness for marriage and your want to spend the rest of your life with them.”

Around them, you enjoy who you are.

Keep an eye on your behavior and emotions when your partner is present. Do you like this version of yourself? According to Sehat, finding a compatible companion can help you be your best self. They can help you have a positive view on life and motivate you to become a better version of yourself.

You both work hard at your connection.

Do you play table tennis against one opponent only? You may wish to delay the wedding bells if you are working hard but get little in return. Sehat asserts that a happy marriage is never one-sided. “It is a good sign that you are ready for marriage when both partners are willing to put in the work,” the adage goes.

You lead separate lives.

The relationships that allow for temporary separation and eventual reunion are the greatest. Sehat counsels, “Marriage is not about surrendering your personality.” “You may maintain a healthy marriage while pursuing your own interests, hobbies, and social circles.”

a happy couple holding books while sitting on concrete bench
Photo by RODNAE Productions on Pexels.com

You may discuss money.

Always a major problem is money. The most crucial, but perhaps least romantic, element, adds Sehat. “You and your spouse should feel at ease talking about money and developing a plan that works for your entire life, not just the wedding. This demonstrates your readiness to run a home and a marriage.” Though it might not be comfortable, sit down and discuss things as soon as possible.

Continue Reading
Advertisement

Trending

%d bloggers like this: